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Is marriage encounters a problem to escape to still be faced? What is the true attitude that solves problem of husband and wife? Civil / love Yan Shuangfei

The netizen that signs not clearly sent a theme to be on August 9, 2010 " affection pours out: How should I do? " mail, content is as follows:

Whether is I do not know really and the union of husband a mistake, I am the woman of an extraordinary woman originally, and he is returned than the woman however woman, very narrow-minded, buying food also buy the sort of the poorest petty gain, let me be overcome really sometimes, these say fortunately, but the most annoying is he always pretends to be I and my netizen to chat, see my chatting record. I wrote a very long letter to let him do not do him so, think he met what touch very much be done in that way no longer, the movement that did not think of him instead more mysterious, actually careful asked two date to chat with two mobile phones and me, really knowing him is how, do not believe me so? Connect between husband and wife most was the accredit of at least done not have how to live even? For with him well the life those effort that I make is he invisible? Look what do I do he also won't understand me, in his heart I do not have the person that the thing punishs namely, in his heart I do not have a bit advantage really, live this kind of short of money life with him I sacrificed how many, why he does not think, why a my " won't leave him because of poverty, won't leave him because of anybody, can love me not quite for him only and abandon him. " cannot touch him however? What my hair changes from words from heart is only " be well written [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], regrettablly too selfish. " since feel my what is bad, why to let me come back even, think my person lives in schoolgirl dormitory to have with so much girl a few days that say to have laugh very happy really. In the home I can get online only in order to dismiss doleful and he always still looks to my complexion, I am short of money life everyday and dejected, use everyday get online the depression that will escape the life, understand me without the person, know me without the person, I can escape only. I did not know how to should do really now, who can tell me, how should I do, how to do?

The nature that everybody has everybody is idiosyncratic, your husband is Mom of the sort of mother-in-law having a place's narrow-minded man, this insufficient of course man, but also not be too big question, the key is the point of view that you want to learn change to see a problem and state of mind. Husband and wife gets along, the most important is not to be transformed each other, go suiting each other however, hoary head arrives old conjugal love husband and wife is not to transform those who come out. Mutual concession, mutual suit, spouse concern ability is harmonious. Even if has transform, also not be subjective go up to be transformed of purpose, be in however in daily life imperceptible the mutual influence between, the opinion that you cannot ask other in part always presses you or viewpoint go act, perhaps ask other in part is changed by your requirement, this is impossible, since is embarrassed the other side, also be embarrassed oneself [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], grind to bring only.

Your respecting is the most annoying is your husband always pretends to be you and your netizen to chat, see your chatting record. This kind of practice is improper apparently, really too narrow-minded, I am to object hitting the banner of love to examine private chatting record all along. But think conversely, why can be he done so? Does yourself have the place that becomes inappropriately? Such saying that the likelihood subdued you, but if want to make marriage harmonious, be about to learn to consider the heart the issue than the heart, the society reviews him.

Since you go up to did not do shameful thing in the network, that does not chat with stranger as far as possible, often chat with the netizen what meaning is there? Some more floriferous time is loving family person to go up. Want, chatting with unfamiliar netizen is wasteful time really, cause easily also ambiguous. Your husband applied for two date and you to chat, apparent he is right you are not at ease, and he can go up a little with you with the identity of a stranger, you are right it is thus clear that of stranger add a good friend not to refuse, you can rise a little easily with stranger unexpectedly, this is done not quite well really, if your husband loves you, to this he does not care impossibly.

Of course, on particular way, he has the place that becomes inappropriately apparently, but the point of view that you also should want to stand in him goes considering an issue. You just cannot indicate your position with the language, for instance " I won't betray you " or " won't leave him because of poverty, won't leave him because of anybody, can love me not quite for him only and abandon him. " etc. These words say well of course, but man and woman are different, the woman believes acceptance, believe honey-tongued [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], what the man pays attention to more is you how to do, how don't you say. The man cares about one the individual's word really, rise pettily may return than the woman very, this undeserved of course praise highly, but understandable. If be changed,be you, an opposite sex adds him to be a good friend and can rise a little casually, can you accept you to you can be at ease? Perhaps you can say you can, that can explain his deal in your heart is not heavy only, love is exclusive forever.

Occasionally [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], change a point of view or change state of mind to consider an issue, can reach different conclusion, it is completely opposite conclusion even.

You say you can get online only in the home in order to dismiss doleful and he always still gives your complexion to look, because you sink blindly,perhaps bring about him at the network just about complexion is not good-looking, my proposal is little get online chat, rely on a network to chat dismiss loneliness is met only more doleful; You say you are short of money life everyday and dejected, use everyday get online the depression that will escape the life, understand you without the person, know you without the person, you can escape only. Since the life is very short of money, that chats with respect to little online sth resembling a net, the network chats is to be between billow take time, do some of real thing as sureness, go all out in work with husband together hard, go improving the life.

In respect of domestic material economy, the man should assume more responsibility of course, but the woman also is not to must wait for a man to raise, husband and wife is equal, you if blame his ability is no good, so you? You also can have domestic economy to make contribution. Just rely on to get online will escape is no good apparently, and can make spouse concern more and more exasperate, cannot solve a problem at all, always chat with the netizen, and a few ideas of the netizen are lousy idea purely sometimes, listen less still had better.

Nobody understands you, nobody knows you, so did you understand your husband? Do you know your husband? The ambiguous zephyr with too much network spends Xue Yue, the network is too visional, a lot of things are not quite real, the information that gets from inside the character of others is not comprehensive, the opposite sex that takes a network to go up goes and oneself other in part is unwise quite, because this kind compares itself,be inequitable. Want to break this kind of current vicious circle, be far from a network, undertaking this kind of netizen that is without a meaning chats no longer especially is crucial one step, return the time that is free from anxiety too in real life.

Of course, I this is not to be in defend your husband, he has a lot of places to be done badly apparently, but those who will pour out is you not be him, and want to break this kind of current deadlock, I still hope you can make sacrifice actively. Hope you can understand my word correctly, if you just come fine words, come to those who comfort to listen, that is without a meaning [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], because that cannot solve a problem at all. Of course, if you close not to come really, you pass very bitterly really, that has closed to come loose very much, but if do not change state of mind, you cannot make sure next meeting is better. Encounter a problem to want how to be solved above all, is not to escape. Do not have hard if really, consider to abandon again.

Lone when can by move strength, want how with respect to how, and marriage is meant more or less the individual sacrifices, some things must want to abandon, this is the expression of marital responsibility, no matter be man or woman should such. Marriage is in bring you certain thing while should lose something necessarily, say with respect to come-and-go of the sexual intercourse that take other, lone when you interact with unlocking, and after marrying, must want to scruple somewhat; Lone when, you like a certain opposite sex, you go after him with going / she, but after marrying, cannot be done so, if must be done so, that divorced to say again first.

Marriage brings you good warmth and happiness, also bring you tie and liability, former build the base in latter just about, do without latter assure, the good warmth that you want and happiness also are an empty talk necessarily, the sweet happiness that you are thinking impossibly to want marriage only does not contribute his sacrifice and responsibility however.
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